Mossad moisturising and plastic noodelicious

I got accosted by a German woman in the shopping centre the other day. She was selling beauty products and spa treatments and she grabbed me by the hand (oi oi!) and the next thing I knew I was having the top layer of skin taken off the back of it by her rubbing oily salt onto it really hard.

All the time, she was going on about the Dead Sea in Israel and how nothing lives there and she kept on rubbing and rubbing and I was thinking, This is starting to hurt. She washed off the salt and oil (I was on the verge of tears at this point), but I must admit that the skin on the back of my had (what was left of it) was delightfully soft. So, after a bit of hard sell, I bought a tub of this stuff - it's a Dead Sea salt and coconut/lavender oil body scrub.

Israel eh? I swear it's something Mossad must use to torture state enemies. A crueler treatment you could never imagine.

The thing is, if nothing grows in the Dead Sea, how can any product coming from there be good for your skin? I bet you could get a bucket of builders' sand and mix it with oil to get the same effect.

I wonder what Ellen MacArthur's skin is like from all that lashing from the salty seas? Perhaps lashing of salty waves from an oil slick might be analogous?...

Anyway, I've just checked out the Dead Sea Cosmetics website and it seems you can even buy a massive bucket of Dead Sea salt for just £21. I'm sure you can get a massive sack of road grit for much less - you can even nick it from the side of the road.


Pot Noodelicious
I love dehydrated/rehydrated foodstuffs (see Dehydrated delights) and I had a Pot Noodle for my lunch today - I certainly know how to live life to the full! Pot Noodles are ace because they're supposed to be nasty and horrible and cheap. They even have a delicious undertone of plastic from the pot in which they're prepared.