Nazi bastards!

I find it strange that our beloved Tony Bleuuuuhhhhrrr and his cronies are trying so hard to protect us from being murdered by marauding terrorists when the NHS can do a perfectly good job of finishing us off themselves. Deaths in UK from "Islamic" terrorists = none? Deaths in UK from hospital acquired infections (2004) = 950. Deaths from infamous NHS Hyde GP = >300. Deaths and injury from NHS cock-ups = ??????? Deaths from allowing thick people to reproduce and eat/smoke/drink themselves into an early grave = hundreds of thousands!

This begs the question: Is Tony Bleuuuhhhrrrr actually in cahoots with Osama Bin Lid, and are his attempts at creating paranoia and histeria merely a smokescreen for his greater plan? The end points are ultimately the same: a police state; erosion of our civil liberties; lots of innocent people dead. For fuck's sake, we were on the verge of being invaded by the Nazis and we still had more freedom than we've got now! The guy should get a grip. Fucking tosser.


IT Police Shitheads
I find it very flattering that people comment on some of my posts and I try to respond, either in this blog or on the pages of those who have been so kind as to visit me. I also have moments of inspiration while I'm at work, I think, I must blog that! Unfortunately, the IT Nazi Bastard Police at work only allow the blog to be viewed and the commenting and posting pages in Blogger are "Forbidden by the ratings check". Even worse, whenever you happen on a "forbidden" site, you are warned that "Your PC's IP address has been noted". Y'what? It's probably some attempt to prevent people slagging off the place during work time - because of course, we can't do it when we get home. DUH!


The ring that binds them
No news on the ring doughnut front from Mother. I wonder if I can get a control order put on her for suspicion of failure to discharge motherly duties. Pressing charges is best avoided because I wouldn't want a messy court case where she ends up with a blanket over her head, muttering "Sigh,what a life". Then again, a control order would have dire consequences for me: who would I get to run my errands for me while I'm out at work? Who'd answer the phone (I hate answering the landline)? Would I ever get any peace and quiet in the house if she was tagged and stuck here?

I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and let her try again tomorrow.


Memory loss
Of course one problem with not being able to do blog at work is that I often forget the really funny stuff and I end up posting a load of complete shite instead.


Weird
I learnt today of a new weirdo crank technique/therapy thing for determining which foods are good for you and which you should avoid at all costs. It's called Kenetosomethingorother and what happens is this:

1. Punter lies on a couch and is blindfolded
2. Actually, I think "1" should be "Punter pays lots of cash"
3. Therapist tests resistance in punter's leg and arm muscles by using their own body weight to push against them (this is like the control step).
4. Therapist waves a glass vial containing a particular food stuff near the punter, then tests muscle resistance again.
5. Repeats resistance tests with a variety of glass-bound foodstuffs that are presented in a random order - the punter remains blind to the contents of the vials throughout.
6. Apparently, muscle resistance and tone changes with each different foodstuff and so things that are particularly bad or good for the punter can be identified.
7. Therapist says "You should eat this and that, but not this or this. Should I book you in for another £500 consultation?"

I'd be fine so long as the therapist said I could eat lots of curry, chips, pasta and ginger biscuits. Actually, I reckon they'd find that I'm OK with certain foods so long as they're not eaten in combination with others (peas in things, mushed up tuna, mashed taters in my gravys)....

I still can't remember what it was I was going to post about.