Loon pants

With there being a strong likelihood of a job interview on the horizon, I bought myself a new suit from Mexx the other day. It's a trouser suit and, although Mexx don't offer a range of lengths, they do offer free alterations on trousers when you buy the suit. Great! The chap pinned them up for me while I was there and I noticed that about a foot of fabric would be taken off them for the alteration. Now, I know I'm not the tallest person in the world, but I'm sure that there aren't that many 6'4" women out there. Why on earth do they make standard length trousers so bloody long?

They're a wide leg, so I bet I look a complete tit in them anyway. Saying that though, I always look a tit in interviews, so it makes no difference to me. In fact, it's tempting to take a leaf from the Michael Jackson book of "dressing for the big occasion" and turn up to interviews and court appearances in your pyjamas and slippers. It'd certainly get you noticed. Let's think of the most outragreous outfits for that big job interview (in no particular order or preference):

1. Mardi gras drag queen (on a float!)
2. Father Christmas - ho, ho, ho!
3. Pirate - pirate accent obligatory (avast ye!)
4. Premiership footballer - you'd have to roll over and feign mortal injury every time they hit you with a tricky question
5. Tramp (preferably with Turette's syndrome)
6. Jedi knight/Knight of the Round Table
7. 80s Rock chick, using a synthesiser to simulate Cher's "I believe" voice
8. A nun or other comedy religious figure, accompanied by "bless you my child" wherever you can fit it in
9. Spaceman
10. NHS middle manager

Of course, what I'd REALLY love to do is dress up as Beatrix Kiddo, Samurai sword and all, and perform ninja moves to each question. Now THAT would be an interview worth seeing!