Deadly feline assassination squad

The South Lakes Wild Animal Park (they don't just talk conservation, they DO it!), thrills its vistors with awesome acts of carnage perpetrated by the big cats there (which is more than can be said for the pathetic penguins). Each feeding time, chickens are placed on top of telegraph poles and the lions and tigers are let into their respective enclosures, where they race to the tops of the poles to collect and devour the chickens: feathers, beaks and all.

Bengal tiger

These babies are too big to climb to tops of the poles....

Sumatran tiger

These buggers get right to the tops (they're only little)

Lion

I suppose its a bit like It's a knockout meets Animal magic, but we're ensured that they do it this way to exercise the animals who'd otherwise laze about all day (anybody who's owned a domestic moggie will understand this).

We were also told of horrible acts committed by poachers who ensnare and kill tigers to sell their bits for Oriental crank medicines. After being caught and tried in Indonesia, one such poacher managed to get out of his 5 year jail term by bribing whoever could get him out. This bloke had been caught by the conservation team as he'd gone back into the jungle to collect his snares, one of which had already been responsible for the death of a female tiger (that leaves about 499 Sumatran tigers now). Fuck, instead of going through legal channels, why didn't they just tie the fucker up in the jungle and let the tigers get him? Bastard.

Or even better, bring him back here and stick him on top of a pole for a special feeding time! What an excellent, super-villain way of killing somebody. Now, when somebody pisses me off, all I need to do is envisage them being suspended from a pole and being eaten feet-up by a big, fuck-off tiger.

I love nature.