All-seeing eye

All-seeing eye
Originally uploaded by cakesniffer.

This is my eye. I took this photo to see the detail of my eyebrow hairs before I plucked them. I didn't pluck all the eyebrow hairs - I'd have looked like Whoopi Goldberg without eyebrows (except I'm not black and I don't look like the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz) - I just removed the ones that were growing through.

Eyebrows are the oddest things; why do we have them?

But yes, this is the eye that sees it all in my world (the other one is made of glass). It is this eye that sends the information to my little brain, where things get jumbled up and spat out with the help of the chemicals that the grey cells are bathed in. It is this eye that was really sore yesterday when my contact lens got folded in the corner after I'd rubbed it a bit too hard. Fucking contact lenses. Bastard things.

Today, my eye sees GREYNESS.

Officially "working from home", I've spent the morning pissing about on the internet, while doctoring a presentation that I'm giving next week with Conservative Party slogans. It'll certainly provoke a discussion amongst the leftie NHS types that I'm doing the training course for and it'll save me having to look at their blank faces. It's more likely that I'll be chased around the hospital site by people baying for my blood. And they let these people vote!

If I was to start a political party, readers of this blog won't be surprised to find that I'd have a very liberal approach to running the country. In fact, this country would run be run a lot better if we had a proper housewife as Prime Minister (and I'm not talking Maggie Thatcher here because she was a bloke). I mean somebody like Dolly from Emerdale Farm or Deirdre Barlow from Corrie. The cabinet would be comprised of women from all walks of life (so long as they weren't spongers) and we'd have men to do things like work in factories and farms, mend cars and washing machines. That's their best place life, not at the hub of power where they get ideas above their station and start trouble all over the globe. Men's egos are far too big, they should never be allowed anywhere near government.

This country needs a good civil war in which anybody who is proved to be worthless (whether they be filthy rich or dolescum underclass) should be cast out! I'd like Bono to be tried for crimes against humanity too. Tosser.