Tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian

I thought it timely to introduce a post with cakesniffing relevance in honour of this blog's name, so I'd like to pay tribute to the very "in" volumes that have emanated from the typewriter of Lemony Snicket. Why cakesniffer? Well anybody who's read the Unfortunate Events books will have come across this term in the 5th of the series, The Austere Academy, where Handler brings in the delightfully vile Carmelita Spats in the Prufrock Preparatory. Carmelita is basically a stuck-up, spoilt bitch and a bully who gets worse as the stories progress and she uses "cakesniffer" (and its derivatives) as a derogatory term for just about anything. Normally, we're led to believe that bullies always get their come-uppance, but there's no sign of this yet and Carmelita is wonderfully horrible in the latest (11th) offering, The Grim Grotto, where she insists on performing her "tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian" dance recital at every opportunity - fantastic. But this is the problem, isn't it? Through our childhoods, we're generally taught that such behaviour is unacceptable, that nobody likes spoilt kids, that we can't always get what we want - this is usually reinforced with a slapped arse and, in all honestly, a good smack on the bum is an excellent cure for brattishness. However, wouldn't it be brilliant if we could get away with being Carmelita ("Are you deaf as well as cakesniffy?")?



There are various websites related to the Snicket books and The Quiet World (http://www.thequietworld.com/books/funnyquotes.shtml) has a load of entertaining quotes from the series. In addition, a good synopsis of the first 11 books can be found at Muggle net - a Harry Potter fan site.



Veggielesbianism is a term coined by Fat Fighters leader, Marjorie Dawes in Little Britain, it's quite funny. Vegetarianism is so civilised compared to eating meat; I hate the idea of farming animals and transporting them to abattoirs and slaughtering the poor little things. I love meat-free foods, I really enjoy meat substitutes - I'd love to go veggie, it's so much more healthy, but I can't. Pathetic, isn't it?



There's something not quite right about listening to Christmas songs in February.