As if.
Things are good. However, I am currently preoccupied with writing a job application. It's a pile of shite. I hate this whole having to sell yourself thing. I'm pretty self-deprecating in real life and it's just not in my nature to be able to highlight my achievements for the sake of making myself look good. Of course, it's probably just the case that I haven't got any achievements worth highlighting in the first place....
Five years in the same job is not good for morale. You lose your confidence and become negative about all aspects of your work. I just know that I'm not happy and I need to get out.
I think the whole idea of work is pretty shite. In evolutionary terms, it's just something to keep people occupied after they breed. Humans were probably better off being hunter-gatherers. Make it through childhood, have some offspring, die when hubby doesn't come home from a day's hunting after he's been eaten by a woolly mammoth - or something like that. What with becoming proper, thinking beings who live past our biological usefulness, we have to think of things to do to earn income. Of course, some people continue to rely on their biological usefulness and make a living out of breeding - very successfully too in the UK. The rest of us have to find jobs to do that pay us money in compensation for taking our time.
Does anybody really enjoy their job? If they did, they wouldn't want to be paid for it, would they?
I'm desperately trying to think of my next career move. Well, a career would be nice I suppose.
Bah! To it all.
Don't panic!
"THEY'RE TESTING THE FIRE ALARMS!" Posh Scouse has just informed us as the bells rang around us. Really? And here's me thinking I was suffering from tinitus. I hope there's a drought and hosepipe ban on Merseyside and Cheshire this year - I cannot WAIT for the whinging and tales of standpipe traumas from this lot.
Oh no, responsibility! Posh Scouse has gone to make a cup of tea and I'm alone. Thank goodness I know she's not far away in case any of their phones ring! I've noticed that everytime anybody leaves their desk here, they announce what they're up to: "Just popping down to the library"; "Just popping over to suchabody's office"; "Just going to the kitchen"; "Just going on my lunch"; "Just going to get my kalashnikov from my car so I can come back in and blow your fucking brains out!"
Ain't it a shame
Flyng saucers could land
But it wouldn't make much difference to my man
I could walk aboard and thank the Lord
And I'd leave this damn town in seconds flat
Check my bags and never come back
Oh, our love is
Like a fuse that's burned out....
Yes folks, alas it's true. The fairytale seems to be over for the most reviled money-grabbing, attention-seeker of the last decade. Ex-beatle Sir Paul McCartney and his gold-digging missus have split.
HA!
HA!
HA!
I bet Stella is pleased.
I don't know why, but i have an irrational (well, sometimes perfectly rational) hatred of certain "celebs". My top ten British(ish) ones are:
- Sir Paul McCartney (and Heather)
- Sir Cliff Richard
- St Bono de Bonio
- Stephen Fry
- Chantelle and Preston (who the fuck?)
- Billy Connolly
- Sienna Miller (I've no idea who she or what she does, is she supposed to be an actress?)
- "Tiger" Tim Henman
- Sir Ellen MacArthur
- Olive from On the Buses
There are loads of people who are famous or "celebrities" just because they hang around with famous people. Heather Mills-McCartney lost her leg in a road accident, met Sir Paul, thought "Aye, aye, me luck's in here", got married, had baby (v clever for the D-I-V-O-R-C-E), annoyed the fuck out of everyone and now everybody is laughing because Macca is ditching the bitch!
I wonder if she'll be signing up for "I'm a celebrity: Get me out of here!". That'd be brilliant.
Hoo-har
The press has been whipping up a frenzy following the murder of an off-duty special constable in London last week. Special constables are volunteers who work with regular police officers for a few hours a week. The press are loving it because a) she was a woman and b) she was an asian lady. It was an horrific crime, but the headlines have escalated to include "Brave PC killed in frenzied knife attack", "Public urged to come forward in hunt for policewoman's killer", that sort of thing.
Now, I'm not wanting to be horrible about any of this, and I'm sure none of these headlines have anything to do with the woman's family, but she wasn't a policewoman, she was a hairdresser. She wasn't on duty when she was killed, it was the night time, she'd been for a meal with her hubby and it seems that she may have been killed with her own kitchen knife that she'd taken with her to investigate a disturbance outside her home.
I wonder what the headlines would be if I was murdered in a frenzied attack? I'm guessing something along the lines of "Thank fuck for that!".
14 comments:
garfer said...
I don't know, poor old Macca gives her a leg (geddit) up in life, and the gold digging cow goes and ditches him.
I must admit that I had a chuckle when I heard the dreadful news.
Bonio was on the BBC news today. Does the twat seriously think that wearing a pair of mauve wraparound sunglasses concentrates our minds on the starving millions. Oirish tosser.
Get a job as an academic. No presure and a nice fat pension scheme.
17 May, 2006 14:17
Yes, I cocked it up and published half a post then Garfer got a comment in before I'd findished it - lack of practice.
Ahh, the life of an academic would certainly be lovely. I need to think of something I could educate the masses in though.
Cripes, I thought I'd grown an afro for a moment there.
Noone would have hair liek that on purpose.
Jesus, you're a moaning little fucker. You're dumped.
The agony I've endured over this application knows no bounds. It's for Greggs, not the sodding CIA.
And you beat me to it with the sad news of the Mills-McCartney break up. Now that's cost him an arm AND a leg.
I'd love to work for the secret service, it'd be fuckin' ace.
I hadn't heard about the split, but am completely pleased by it. She completely rubbed me the wrong way. But then he did, too. Maybe they should continue to be together so as not to inflict themselves on other unsuspecting people.
Good luck with the job hunt and all that.
What's the difference between a special constable and a regular police officer? I'm just a confused American, I guess, because I don't see how you could be a policewoman and a hairdresser at the same time...
As for the McCartney split, can I just say "Ding, dong, the witch is dead." Such an obvious gold-digger.
Well bronwen, like I said, Specials are just folks like you and me who do volunteer policing for a few hours a week
good luck with the job hunt.
I have no use for celebs. There is something wrong with our society, always admiring people who manage to get themselves in front of a camera.
*Remembers Olive from On the Buses with fondness*
*Remembers Sniffy photo October 05 with fondness*
*Thinks naughty thoughts*
I have GOT to start reading more closely. This is the second fuck-up of this nature I've committed.
What photo's that then SID?
ya know? hadn't thought of it that way, but you are probably right, it's part of the conspiracy to make us feel useful after giving birth to our leeching parasites.
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