Soft shoe shuffle

I really hate it when people don't pick their feet up when they walk. Instead, they slop and shuffle about, dragging their stupid feet along the floor.

Lazy twats.

Of course, there may be a cultural aspect to this as I've noticed that a fairly high proportion of oriental-looking students walk in this way, arms folded across their chests or linked through those of their companions. These are the ones that have those really miserable expressions on their faces (as opposed to the oriental folk who always have really smiley expressions). They always dress very fashionably though, well, I wouldn't call it fashion, but I guess it's very "in" if you're of that age.

There's a thing that (usually straight) couples do when they walk along, holding each other. This is quite entertaining when there's a considerable size mismatch as the woman's height (lack of it) means that she drags the man down to her. They stumble along looking as if one is holding the other up, or perhaps rugby tackling them. A very odd way of showing one's affection I think; giving your loved one chronic back and hip problems. Just hold their hand, they won't think any less of you. Unless of course, the bloke is actually holding the woman up because he's slipped her a rohypnol and she can't stand up on her own... blimey.

Luckily I never find myself in the position where anybody wants to be seen anywhere near me as I plod and list along the pavement and my weird Jemima Puddleduck way of one-sided waddling. I'm sure there's a difference in the length of my legs that means that I have to concentrate really hard or I end up walking in a circle. I therefore never have to suffer the uncomfortable situation of somebody leaning on me. It'd end up looking like a gay three-legged race.

Somebody once slipped their hand into my coat pocket and took my hand in theirs. It was lovely and I don't think they noticed the collection of used paper tissues in there. That sounds like I've only ever held hands with somebody on one occasion, but you know what I mean. I still do that non-gender-specific way of talking about people, errrm WOMEN. Weird that.

Ho hum.


IT Nazi bastards in spying scandal
Word has it that all our managers are receiving lists of all the websites we visit while at work, and the time spent at each site. If that's the case, I'd like to give a big warm welcome to Sarah and assure her that I only check my Yahoo account every 15 minutes to pick up the NHSnet e-mails that get forwarded home and that I only check into my fave blogs first thing in the morning while Outlook wakes up and while I'm on my dinner break.

Oh and this is my blog yes, please don't laugh at me too much. Thanks.


A pressie from Connie
The NHS is BRILLIANT! All that free at the point of use healthcare and they give you controlled drugs even when you don't need them. Mum was given a load of codeine phosphate after her op. She told the nurse she couldn't have them because they upset her tummy, so instead of taking them back, the nurse gave her some paras as well!

You see, it's not only that April who's handy with a scanner!

So, it seems that my weekend is sorted (yeh!), so I'll be back here, chirpy as ever, once I've had my stomach pumped.


An edit. To the person on aol who came to Cakesniffers after doing an MSN search for "dogging in Swinton": You dirty little bastard! But I suggest you try Clifton or Worsley woods...