Most of the things I cook involve two pans: one for cooking something in boiling salted water (pasta, rice); one for cooking a sauce (curry, chilli, bolognese, etc). Most of the things I cook start with me peeling an onion.
The first act in the preparation of 80% of my main meals gets me really, really annoyed.
Onions. They either have a tissue-thin skin that comes off in the tiniest bits, or you find that the first five layers of onion are bad and have to be removed with the skin; leaving usable onion amounting to something the size of a pickle. So then you have to peel another of the fuckers, by which time your eyes are streaming and nose is dripping.
If only the chippy wasn't still shut. Where the hell have they gone? I really hope they weren't on holiday in Szechuan when the earthquake hit. Then again, we'll be moving soon anyway, so it won't matter whether they're dead in a hellish nightmare of a natural disaster.
And, back to peelings, is there an easy way to peel a hard boiled egg? There must be some method to getting the shells off without digging your nails into the eggy whiteness; it doesn't lend itself to good presentation. Or hygiene.
Heathens in hot places
Very hot places, in fact. It seems that Kenya has a problem with witchcraft and this makes people think they have the right to burn elderly people to death.
Trump's response to seeing that was "what fucking century are we living in?". Indeed, it seems that there increasing numbers of total fucking lunatics on this planet and, what's even more worrying is that they tend to breed faster than the rest of us. We'll be over-run with religious nutcases in a generation.
Cadbury's chocolate digestives
I bought some of these last night, thinking they were McVities. They're OK in an emergency, but not as nice as McVities.
12 comments:
I'm surprised the supermarkets don't sell pre chopped onions in convenient re-sealable freezer bags.
Perhaps you should suggest this to Tesco, they might give you a years supply of McVities as a reward.
I think you already can Garfer; I'm sure it was mentioned on Delia's cheatings.
The McVities factory is a hop, skip and a jump away from where we live - I could go on a night time raid for some choccie digestives.
Okay, I admit I ready the bit about Kenya and could have sworn you'd put 'bum elderly people to death'.
So I clicked the link and read it, TWICE. But no, no bumming to death. And then re-read your post.
Worried now, why did i think it said bum?
I have some cadburys fingers to keep me warm - yummy. Chocolate (proper british stuff) is one of the things I know I'm going to miss.
Tesco and (shudder) Iceland both sell frozen chopped onions.
Personally, I've never had a problem with chopping onions. Probably because I don't shop at Asda with their shite quality veg.
As for boiled eggs - that's dead easy - When boiling them, put a little vinegar in the water. The shell will then come off so easy you wont believe it (and no, they dont end up tasting like pickled eggs either).
Choccy Digestives simply HAVE to be McVities.
As a last resort, Tesco own ain't too bad.
I'm pleased Hergey mentioned choccy fingers. I love shoving them up Tazzy's arse and nibbling them back out (he has great muscle control there). I might just do it tonight.
Yum.
I bet Taz and Pig do daisy chaining with chocolate fingers and their other dirty little friends. Filthy little knob jockeys. They're so disgusting, the cafe we took them in shut down two weeks after our visit.
Yes, they tried fumigating it, but nothing could rid the place of their filth.
There you go, no more choccy fingers for me tonight thank you Mr Piggy.
Go on Herge, you know you want to...
Already have ta!
Ooooh, dirty boy.
Which cafe? The pompous organic one?
I quite liked it in there.
And don't you try and tell us you've never played with chocolate fingers.
Nor you, Smithy! We know your sort.
Do all boys like to have their bumholes playing with?
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