Me, that's who.
The items are scanned so quickly that they fly to the end of the conveyor belt. And they pile up and all the time you're still struggling to get a carrier bag off the stand. Flustered and annoyed, you finally manage to get a bag from the stand and then comes the struggle to get the fucking thing opened. At this point, all the shopping has been scanned and the checkout youth is left staring at you with an expression of utter contempt having replaced the one of boredom, they add to the discomfort by telling you the total price of your shopping. You just know that they're calling you a spaz and muttering under their breath, "Should've accepted my help to pack, fucktard!".
Supermarket carrier bags used to be quite easy to get separated, but not any more. I blame the greenies and their insistence on us reusing suitcases when doing our supermarket shopping. Well actually, some of us like to collect plastic carrier bags to use for a) bin liners and b) picking up dog poo.
Besides, I'm too young to be using one of those bloody shopping carts like my parents had when I was a kid. You know the sort that were always made of brown or tartan vinyl?
I used to pootle along in front of my mum as we made our way from the mad-busy supermarket to the bus stop. I'd stop at my peril because this usually resulted in me being stabbed in the back of the leg from the spiky stand of the bag. She never did it on purpose or anything.
Rocky update
Rocky finished his puppy training tonight. I'd been looking forward to it all week, but the shitheads in Bury Council decided to resurface a section of road on our way to the class tonight - before the end of rush-hour. Huge tailbacks ensued and we were half an hour late for the class, he was unable to concentrate because he wanted to say hello to his friends and the whole event was a fucking waste of time.
But never mind, he's been doing other things. Like growing his grown up teeth...
Taking his first dip....
And learning how to fly!
11 comments:
Yay! First!
Puppy training? Fucking puppy training?
You pretentious cunts. What's wrong with training the puppy yourself, like the rest of us do?
*slaps forehead*
How difficult can it be to tell a dog to 'sit', 'fetch' 'walkies'?
Next thing we know, te poor thing will we wandering around in a diamante collar and sporting this seasons latest doggy-fashion-raincoats and bootee's.
Yay! First!
Puppy training? Fucking puppy training?
You pretentious cunts. What's wrong with training the puppy yourself, like the rest of us do?
*slaps forehead*
How difficult can it be to tell a dog to 'sit', 'fetch' 'walkies'?
Next thing we know, te poor thing will we wandering around in a diamante collar and sporting this seasons latest doggy-fashion-raincoats and bootee's.
I only said that once - the interweb submitted it twice!
It's puppy socialisation if you must know. He goes to meet other puppies so he can get used to them. And we get to learn tips on how to train him.
He has got a raincoat, but it's too big for him at the moment.
Now piss off, you'd do the same for your baby!
The best thing I ever taught my dogs is the phrase "Those who want to eat, have to go out!" It gets them out from underfoot when I'm putting food in their bowls (they're corgis, therefore highly motivated by food) or when guests come over and I just want them out from underfoot in general.
We never did puppy socialization - Slider drools around other dogs and Zippy was one of 20-odd puppies (3 litters born in 2 days - poor planning, that) so he was plenty socialized.
Diamante collar? A chav dog? Never!
Have you bought him a little treadmill yet?
They're all the rage.
He loves other dogs - way too much. He gets really excited around them and starts jumping on their heads. The classes have been great for getting him to act calmly around other dogs.
He is the most spoilt animal in the world. So far, we have bought him: 3x rubberised toys; puppy kong; puppy air kong; teething blanket; bed blankie; buster cube; 2X beds; 2X tennis balls on ropes; 3 brushes; a sleeping bag; tuggie rope; squeaky hippo; squeaky rubber chicken; plus his rain coat. His favourite toys are 500ml plastic drinks bottles (we put dog biscuits in them). Ruined!
Okay, I've read this one now.
How about posting twice in a week for a change?
Hurry along now, there's a good girl.
Ok, Ok, I'll try to think of something.
Yay!
What's even more annoying is when the mong checkout assistant asks if you want help, you say No, but they pack anyway!
FFS! They never pack properly, or only put a few things in each bag, and take forever doing it.
I love having crushed-by-cartons-grapes when I get home.
Twats.
Post a Comment